This rant is seemingly trivial, but by the end however, I hope to convince you that this is a symptom of a much much more insidious problem. Trolling the internet today looking for some dress shoes I liked (not easy in this day and age) I came across this… this… insanity… I can’t just explain it. You’ll have to see it you would never simply believe my words (though you really really should).
Um… I ah… KILL! KILL! KILL! KILL! Sorry I ah think I’m a bit calmer now. Ok folks lets start with the facts:
- Fact 1: The Spring-Summer Gucci “shoes” pictured here are what as known as Flip-flops or thongs by some.
- Fact 2: The flip-flops shown are not as I originally postulated based on price solid gold 24k braded wire straps set into a half-inch thick platinum sole topped with a space age cushioning technology.
- Fact 3: flip-flops of this style (i.e. cheap plastic strap set into a semi-rigid foam sole not) can be purchased for around $2 to $3.
These facts being stated I am forced to ask what kind of mindless fashion drone would pay at best $166 dollars more for a simple pair of flip-flops? It’s the butt ugly Gucci “G” pattern on them? Is a pattern that is made of a simple letter repeated endlessly silk screened in white on the part hidden by your foot worth $166 dollars (regular $327)? In a word, NO! I have nothing against the rich. They can spend money on anything they want. To overspend this much however for the cheapest of possible items… it’s the worst kind of snobbish superiority. To flaunt a huge yacht or gargantuan house is one thing. To flaunt the fact that you can waste money on something you could get for much less… is idiocy. The idea that this is “fashion” is even more preposterous than the “fashion” industry itself. The “fashion” industry is populated mostly by useless people who think that the most important thing in the world is the next stupid unwearable dress that will never make it to any shelves in any store anywhere. Why a person can be duped into seeing increased value in something that is either hideous or indistinguishable from a cheaper version because it has some designer’s or company’s name on it is beyond comprehension. AE for instance can sell a $3 t-shirt for $16 simply because it advertises the store that is selling it. Abercrombie & Fitch charges $29.50 for the same right to do their advertising for them. If you were wearing a shirt to support say AMD for example because you like their products that’s a different story. AMD’s product is not the advertising. AE, A&F, and Aeropostle are not so much clothing stores as they are advertising agencies that only advertise themselves. It’s a vicious cycle. A few years ago Sketchers was selling shoes solely based on the statement “It’s the ‘S’.” Nothing in the ads said anything about the shoe. Buyers were to simply get this footwear because there was an “S” on it. I don’t however blame these companies. A company that wants to stay in business can only sell what people will buy. The problem, therefore, is the people who buy this crap. Aye, there’s the rub. This is where this rant goes from trivial to vital in one quick logic jaunt. These empty mindless personality bankrupt drones are one of the reasons for the downfall of society. The mindset that makes you blindly follow popular trends and crazes is the same mindset that allows the politicians to convince you that rights are bad and that only the other party is trying to hold you down. This is the same mindset that buys into the fairytale that “the man” is holding minorities down. This is the same mindset that allows the populous to be herded behind a political cause like so many sheep. Blind patriotism is a result of this mindset. Racism is a result of this mindset. Religious intolerance is a result of this mindset. Originality, creativity, and free thought are the antidote. (more to come)
I write this rant, admittedly, about a slightly less vital topic than political corruption or outright tyrannical conspiracy. To me however, it is still a matter of justice and vendetta. I speak today, dear readers, of King Kong. Not the classic vaunted 1933 classic, no. I speak of Peter Jackson’s 2005 daudle. Aside from that fact that it isn't an original idea, the man has OTHER responsibilities, namely THE HOBBIT. Ian Holm will be 74 next month and Ian McKellen is no spring chicken at 66. Time is running out. The oldest member of the King Kong cast that I could find will be 54 in October and he's not even a main character. Now I find out that Peter Jackass is suing New Line because he feels he's being cheated on the royalties from DVD sales. Hey Pete SUE THEM AFTER YOU MAKE THE HOBBIT! It's not like he's starving. I am calling to all the readers of this blog to boycott King Kong. If you HAVE to see it do it in a way the gives no money to O'le Petey Boy. You guys know what I'm talking about; You're all net-savvy individuals and you don't need me to spell out how to see a movie for free. Not only do I call for this boycott of King Kong alone but of every Peter Jackson film till he realizes his responsibilities and starts production of The Hobbit. I vow that the next Peter Jackson film I see will be The Hobbit or nothing at all.
Just the way I always said...
Which Historical Lunatic Are You?
An open letter to the “author(s)” of the yellow and white “Vote NO May 3rd” fliers:
First off to the proposed millage, I say yea. Now, to the person or persons (we’ll never know because they didn’t have the courage to sign it) responsible for Sunday’s flier: Let’s “bond together [sic]” and send these folks to an English class. The phrase is BAND together. Also, you can’t be the citizen of a student of Jefferson Schools even if you do capitalize the first letter of “Students [sic]” in the middle of the sentence. These are all grammatical errors, however. The real errors are in the premises set forth. I would like to see the data on this $75,000 per anum salaried “secretary”. The author(s) of this document put secretary in quotation marks so perhaps they are taking a bit of interpretative license on the job title. As for Superintendent Fitzpatrick threatening a gym full of middle schoolers, I would be curious to know exactly what weapons this one man was wielding. Could the author(s) mean that Fitzpatrick was using the loss of school programs as the weapon? If that’s the case then these aren’t horrible threats coming from our Superintendent. These are terrible consequences firmly seated in the reality of running a school on a pauper’s budget. I see our esteemed author(s) suggests a trip to the Rec. Center to see the fliers posted there. Only one problem with that suggestion: the Rec. Center is closed to the public thanks to the fiscal management under the “leadership” of the last millage election’s naysayers. That’s right I’m speaking of our esteemed former school board members Andring and Polk, both of whom insisted that Jefferson didn’t need the amount of money they were getting. Thanks to some legislative changes in Lansing that amount would never return once lost. This, our two stooges realized too late. The author(s) concludes by saying, “…if you want to pay higher taxes for your kids to sit in a classroom and watch movies, then vote yes.” This time they’re partially right. If you want your kids to have a classroom to sit in (at least one with decent teacher and reasonably small student count) vote yes. Higher taxes should be considered an investment, not only in the kids the benevolent author(s) claim to be thinking of, but in the very property that is subject to the tax. Ask a realtor what sort of hit your property value will take when the school district goes to pot. The movies mentioned were, at least in my experience, films like “To Kill a Mockingbird” which we watched after reading the text as part of a state-mandated curriculum. Despite the promised conclusion, our author(s) goes back to attacking the pro-millage flier, saying, “Do you actually believe the students endorsed them sending this out?” Actually, yes, yes I do. I believe they did because my friends and I would have. It has more credibility because there is at least an indication of who might be responsible for it. As for the smoothie machine, I’m quite confident that the funds for it came out of snack shop profits as part of the business class. Now, I’m not saying there have not been funding mismanagements in the past, but you don’t cure a sleepwalker by cutting off their legs. Jefferson needs this money; many special programs are riding on it. Band, for instance, has consistently been shown to improve test scores in students. Your property values and kids’ education are on the line. There once was a dream that was Jefferson. I got out before it turned into a nightmare because of a millage denial. Choose wisely.
(Jefferson Alumni Class of ’02, Cofounder: Alumni for Higher School Standards)
OK OK what is it with censorship its friggin out of hand. I was watching TBS at about 8-9ish on a Sunday night and on comes The Patriot. Admittedly, its not the absolute best in the historical accuracy department but a its a damn fine piece of cinema anyhow. I'm a sucker for a film that has that much flinty action. This however is not the reason for this little narrative. There is a scene in which Mel Gibson's character hacks a red coat up with a tomahawk. Now the censorship I expected was for the frame of the shot to be screwed up so that you couldn't see the blows actually landing. This is bad enough, but the mud-brick ziggurat the broke the camel's everything was that they color shifted the image to turn the blood he had on his face and shirt to mud... before he went into the water the smaller amount of blood was blood, after the hacking episode... mud... it happened later too in the final battle, blood during, mud after. Now besides the obvious insult to my intelligence, the fact that they took the horror of 18th century combat and made it into a mud wrestling match makes ME M- M- MAAAD. If they change a book they have to put abridged to let you know its crap beforehand. Not so with a film. A film the art of hundreds of people can be hacked into shreds and passed off as the same thing. Earlier I saw that AMC was running a special in conjunction with ABC News (when you see the word "News" you know you're in for a crock) about censorship. Apparently AMC sees a problem with... well we'll let them say that here is their write up for this show:
"Bleep! Censoring Hollywood, produced by ABC News Productions, reveals how a controversial movement is rocking the boardrooms at Hollywood studios, the Directors Guild, and home entertainment companies. In today's DVD/home video marketplace, several small businesses are buying copies of Hollywood's most popular movies to edit out sex, violence, and foul language. Once "cleansed," they are sold again as so-called "family friendly" versions -- without the consent of the films' directors or film studios. A cut here, an edit there -- it's driving Hollywood crazy. The self-appointed movie sanitizers are gaining an increasingly mainstream following among parents who want peace of mind and more control over what their kids watch. The documentary profiles major players in the "film sanitizing" business, such as CleanFlicks and ClearPlay, explores the broader debate of censorship vs. artistic freedom in the digital age as well as addresses the motives and passions of various political and entertainment advocates in this ongoing debate."--amctv.comWell well looks like someone agrees with me eh, dear reader... WRONG! AMC is one of the worst butchers. They hacked Blazing Saddles to bloody ribbons even going so far as to cut out most of the fart scene. Daft humor I agree but still PART OF THE FREAKIN FILM. A scene important enough to the writers, the director, and cast who acted in it for the expense to include it in the film. Does the FCC think we need to be protected from fart jokes... Well here is something for the networks and the FCC to censor: FUCK OFF! We'll see if that turns to "FORGET YOU!" when I post it... Here is a clue folks if you have to cut a film up to show it on TV... DON'T! JUST FUGGIN' DON'T! "But omnipotent one", you say, "think of the kiddies". FUG THAT here is something to think of... parenting. Try that one on for size. But that is a different rant. Ugh... I gotta go watch the unrated version of something... Viva le Internet!
So I completed the online "What is your Medieval name?" quiz...
Your medieval name is: Gweneveire. You are
innocent, quiet, beautiful and angelic. You
harbor an inner beauty and you usually keep to
yourself, following the lines of conformity.
You're totally innocent and loyal.
What is your Medieval name?
brought to you by Quizilla
I'm not laughing... OK... yes I guess it is a bit humorous... but not posting in an age makes me angry... Holiday/Santa rant in the works...
In the immortal words of Captain Tenneal, "... LETS GO!". Security... security is pissing me off. Where has our collective spine gone? At what point did the collective American liver yellow? The odds of death in a terror attack are astronomical. Truly huge beyond mentioning. A body is at higher risk every morning that they might fall and bust their skull open on the tub's edge. Yet people think that defence against this miniscule threat of terror attack is worth destroying our way of life, betraying the very principles this country was (at least intellectually if not practically) founded on. I've got news for you, IT ISN'T. Ben Franklin knew it when he said, "Those who would give up liberty for security deserve neither liberty nor security." If you want total security get a time machine and go live in Nazi Germany or Stalin's Russia (ignoring WWII). These are the kind of societies that result from a desire for total security. Security is another word for control. The more needless security procedures they impose, the more hoops we have to jump through as citizens, the more they track citizens movements, the more control they can exercise over us. The first 10 amendments to our constitution were demanded by many of the states before they would agree to live under this sacred document and its guidelines. Why? Because without the protection of those rights they knew the government would slowly desire to exact more and more tyrannical control over its citizenry. They knew that if it wasn't specifically spelled out in ink on parchment the new government would soon conveniently forget its high minded ideals as revolutionary fervor cooled. As Frank Herbert wrote, "Power attracts the corruptible." Those who have power want more. Power in essence is control. So based on the mathematical law If A=B and B=C than A=C, power can be achieved through the nice plush name of security. Yesterday I heard a news report regarding Iraqi police recruitment. Seems that the bastards that are so attached to the old dictatorial ways will beat and/or kill those who they find to be recruits. Yet these brave Iraqis come back to the training stations day after day even after being beaten horribly. They refuse to be intimidated. They will take the losses, endure the blows to uphold a dream that as of now is only a wisp of cloud on the wind, the dream of a FREE Iraq. They are exemplifying the kind of guts that I used to believe were intrinsic to the American psyche. Well ladies and gentlemen, our dream was in wisp form 230 years ago. It has since solidified into an unshakable rock. In the name of security, however, that rock is being chipped away. This pisses me off something royal. I love The United States Of America. I don't want to be a citizen of whatever they will rename it after they destroy all the founding principles of freedom. Perhaps they won't rename it. Maybe they'll just let it stand as the world's biggest lie. Maybe they'll keep the name in an Orwellian mockery of the values for which it used to stand: "LIBERTY and JUSTICE for all". So the next time the congress critters of the president tell you that you need to "temporarily" relinquish some of your rights (ie. patriot act) to fight whatever boogieman they come up with, remember Patrick Henry's words, "Give me liberty or give me death!" and the New Hampshire state motto, "Live free or die." Freedom was worth almost certain death to revolutionary patriot soldiers. Shouldn't it be worth the astronomically low chance of death today? Death isn't all that bad compared to tyrannical slavery. I'm going to run around outside my house hurling insults at the legislature now... because it's my right... and they need reminding...
OK I'm calmer now... finally... but calmer doesn't necessarily mean I'm not still really miffed. What else would you expect from me? Here's the deal: G4 is sub-par, always has been sub-par, and always will be sub-par. For the purposes of mathematical comparison we will assign G4 with a value of -5. TechTV on the other hand (rerun frequency aside) was awesome and always has been awesome. We shall assign TechTV the value 9. Therefore any daft git can see that 9+-5=CRAP! There is far more of the G4 crap on G4TechTV than the good TechTV stuff. Canceling Call For Help... nice move assholes! One of the incoherent babblings on the message boards read, "But aren't CFH and TSS kinda the same show? I've never watched them but by the description they seemed to be basically the same." ... I don't know where to begin quite frankly... I guess I'll start with an intellectual response... YOU'RE A FAWLKING MORON! SON OF A BITCH! I HATE THE HUMAN RACE THAT SPAWNED SUCH A LOWLY SPECIMEN! YOU ARE NOTHING MORE THAN A PILE OF FILTH SKIMMED FROM THE SCUMMY RANCID SURFACE OF THE GENE POOL! IT SHOULD BE LAW THAT PEOPLE LIKE YOU BE STERILIZED SO THAT THEY CANNOT PROCREATE!... OK now that that's out of the way lets disect this statement rationally and attempt to make a generalization of the average mentality of the G4 viewer. Point one: The statement, "TSS and CFH are the same show" is grounded solidly in fallacy. The more astute of you may point out (rather rudely), "But... it wasn't a statement dear author, it was a question." At first glance yes it does end in a "?" and start with a query marker word. This is the sort of question that one asks in leu of making a statement, the type of question that supposed know-it-alls ask when they just want their "truth" to be agreed to. Isn't that right? So they have the grand but wildly false opinion based on never watching the show... Congrats... therefore I am forced to conclude that said person is of a rather low mentality. The really aggravating thing is that G4 is all about gaming. An entire network devoted to only gaming. XPlay, however, performs the function of the entire network of G4 to a higher level than all of their shows ever could hope to achieve. "How? Why?" you ask? Well, lets look at the programming models:
G4's programming model:
-Get beautiful people and muscle bound steroid burnouts (ie. popular AE, Tommy Hilfiger, Old Navy drones) to read cue cards and teleprompter about stuff they've never done and care very little about.
TechTV's programming model:
-Get people who know the material and play games in their spare time. Some of whom happen to be quite attractive, but that's not a requirement. Knowlege is (attractiveness is a perk [Luv ya Morgan, Swish, TSS Babe Corral]).
-Showcase as many aspects of technology as can be effectively (and sometimes ineffectively) done within the restrictions of the medium.
G4 employs talking heads while TechTV has substance. Its as clear as day. The message boards show it there are very few posts reading, "TechTV sux!", while the net simply overflows with, "G4 sux!" G4 however was not content to simply ruin the network, oh no, they also felt the need to destroy the website. TechTV's site while it had flaws (ie. search engine) was easy to navigate and extremely informative. G4 has destroyed this harmonious balance buy burying all the useful tech info and indeed relevant gaming news amidst endless frames tables and advertisements. I used to check TechTV.com every day to get the latest tech news and virus threats in one easy go. Now I'm forced to check several message boards and assorted web news agencies simply to replace that daily summation. G4 with their idiotic fiddlings with the hosting of TSS and the cancellation of CFH have reduced my viewership of TechTV from 90% of my TV viewing to 0%. I haven't watched G4TechTV since the 3rd or 4th day of it's existence. I cannot stand the travesty that my favorite network has been reduced to. G4 has ripped the soul from TechTV and It makes me furious. The only show worth a damn on G4 is Arena. I have no doubt, however, that if TechTV had done the show it would actually meet up to it's potential. TechTV was for geeks by geeks. G4 is more like pop-culture slaves privately mocking geeks. GAH! I need a breather before I burn down an Old Navy...
If your interested in an illustrated version of this rant check out the comic strip USER FRIENDLY by J.D. "Illiad" Frazer for these dates:
June 15th, 2004
June 16th, 2004
June 17th, 2004
June 18th, 2004
Do you folks (my huge and highly educated audience) want to know what I hate most about blog sites? Of course you do! Otherwise you wouldn't be readers of this, MY blog site. What I hate most about blog sites is their tendencies to lag behind, to be abandoned, to promise posts and then not deliver, to interrupt your the reader's intellectual stimulation regimen. Posts like "Coming soon I'll talk about this" and then lo and behold the aforementioned post (eagerly awaited I'm sure) never materializes. I know what you are all thinking right now:
"Begging sir's pardon your most noble, most highly honored authorness.", you say "Did not your last post fit this description?"
"WHAT OUTRAGEOUS INSOLENCE!!!", say I, "I mean... YOU'RE BANISHED FROM THE SITE!! No... wait... you're perfectly correct of course... if a bit rude."
I apologize for what you have pointed out and I shall endeavor in future to make my supposed "errors" less obvious... or be nonexistent... er something... Anywho, I've lost the prose for now and am typing mindless gerbils or gerbless mindbils... Farewell dear dear (if a bit rude) readers till next we meet on southbound exit 42 off the information superhighway... I need a 'dew...
A rant about G4techtv and Comcast... as soon as I calm down enough to write coherently... or at least to my usual level...
I was recently presented with this award:
You are a MASTER of the English language!
While your English is not exactly perfect,
you are still more grammatically correct than
just about every American. Still, there is
always room for improvement...
How grammatically sound are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
Who knew? Certainly not my english teachers...
Well folks, wonder of wonders, today's post isn't a rant. Its actually major kudos to a company to which I've always been loyal. Today, dear friends, that loyalty was rewarded and deeply re-affirmed. The company of which I speak is Creative Labs, makers of the SoundBlaster. I started on my path of corporate worship in my early years, realizing it was too much of a pain to try to emulate a SoundBlaster in dos games when you could just get the card and it would work. Back then games pretty much only worked 100% of the time on a SoundBlaster card. Well a week or so ago I got a hankerin' for nostalgia and decided to assemble my random collection of archaic computer parts into a vintage gaming machine. The most prized of these random parts (and by far the most important) was my SoundBlaster 16 card (circa 1994). I was worried about being able to procure some retro dos/win95 drivers for this puppy. On a whim I went to Creative's site and shockingly they have drivers for every card they ever made. Including my precious SB-16. This is a shinning example of product support. If its their product they support it, no matter how unlikely the need for that support will be. It's sad to think that this is not anywhere close to the standard. Not only did they have the driver, but they also hosted it on their site and downloading it was an experience somewhat akin to nirvana. Thank you Creative Labs. Thank you... I'm gunna cry... I need a minute... Its just too beautiful...
What is it with chain mail emails? Whats the draw? Why do you feel the need to send it to me? I for one am slightly too intelligent to believe that forwarding anything anywhere will result in anything but pissed friends and a slight bandwidth draw on the inter-web. Look people I know you can't all be that stupid. In fact some of the people sending them to me are friends of mine. Good friends. Who I know are capable of cognitive thought. First of all you will not:
by forwarding an email. Nothing, I repeat, NOTHING will result from forwarding this garbage. If you need more than my infallible word on this then visit this site. I Just don't get it. I've never forwarded anything like that. EVER. And another thing, you people and your "send to all" button. Knock it off. Sometimes your crappy messages don't apply to everyone in your address book! And if I get another email yelling at me about something I don't do... Those emails that have ">>>" all over the place in them are an insult. Honestly am I not worth the 3.5 seconds it takes to pull that email into wordpad and do a find/replace on the ">" character?? ugh, I need to count to 3...
Well here we go. Lets get started with some good ole fashioned rage. What is up with downloads these days!? 5-7 years ago there was a link on the site that said "download" and that's exactly what it did. The next screen you saw was the "open or save as" dialog box. Nowadays you'll have to pick from a rediculus number of mirror sites as if it actually is really worth the time you spend looking for the closest mirror when you downloading a 1MB file. Even worse way over half of the mirrors are sites that want your personal information before letting you have a file that, in the case of a game patch, you have a right to anyhow. Why do they need me to register? What possible good could that do me? I'll give you a lil' hint....NONE! ABSOLUTELY NONE! ZIP! ZILCH! The only thing they could do with that info is spam the hell out of me. Some sites go a step worse. That right, it gets worse. They force you to download their piece of crap download manager to get the "secure download". WTF? Why do I need a "secure download" for a publicly available file? I don't want your crap I just want the file you have that the makers of the game should be hosting themselves! Its called:
That's how you do it! You hear that Blizzard!!! That's how you do it! AGH! I gotta count to 3 now....